Aboodi Shabi

After a difficult financial year last year, and knowing that the future looked uncertain, I decided to move into a smaller and cheaper flat, which I did towards the end of last year.

Although the flat is smaller, it is a much nicer space, or at least it has the potential to be, and it has a proper management company who actually care about the building and the residents.

One of the things that I liked most about the flat was the elegant parquet flooring through-out the apartment. Admittedly it was covered by a hideous carpet, and badly in need of sanding and re-varnishing, but I new that once Id decorated the flat, Id be able to get the floor restored and was looking forward to the beauty of a newly-polished old wooden floor.

But, it was not to be.

The management company, on finding out my plans, pointed out that one of the rules of the building is that all floors must be carpeted to minimise the noise disturbance to the other residents. Of course, I was disappointed, but the more I thought about it the more at peace I became with this. I had a long discussion with the Building Manager about it, and ended up telling him that I would rather live in a building where there were rules and a structure to take care of the residents than in a free-for-all like the last place I lived in, where the communal areas were shabby and neglected.

And, it made me think again about the idea that getting what we want is always a good thing, and that restrictions and limits are a bad thing. Actually, the benefit of community is one that I think its worth making personal sacrifices for.

As regular readers will be aware, one of my pet themes is the problem of entitlement. And in an apartment block, or neighbourhood, or country, or even a world, in which getting my own way, or doing what I want, is more important than following the rules of a community, or respecting limits, then, I think, things soon fall apart.

The dark shadow of the cult of individual freedom is that, ultimately, community becomes seen as restrictive or limiting, and we put our own personal satisfaction above the good of the whole. Werner Erhard used to talk of a world that works for everyone, which requires a very different way of being in the world than the pursuit of individualism and personal freedom at all cost.

From the perspective of a world that works for everyone, we have to navigate between my personal wants and freedoms and the good of the community, and there are some important things for us to reflect on:

What are the things that I want, and how do they impact on the community, and on the wider world?

What are the benefits to me of the community, or relationships, that becomes available to me when I let go of getting my own way, or of doing what I want?

What difference will it make to my community, or to the world at large, if I let go of some of my personal freedoms?

Quotes:

“We can choose to live in a ‘you or me’ world, or in a ‘you and me world”. – Werner Erhard.

“You see, the whole thing in marriage (for marriage, substitute, community/neighbourhood, etc) is the relationship and yielding – knowing the functions, knowing that each is playing a role in an organism… marriage is an ordeal; it means yielding, time and again. That’s why it’s a sacrament: you give up your personal simplicity to participate in a relationship. And when you’re giving, you’re not giving to the other person: you’re giving to the relationship. And if you realize that you are in the relationship just as the other person is, then it becomes life building, a life fostering and enriching experience, not an impoverishment because you’re giving to somebody else. This is the challenge of a marriage.”- Joseph Campbell

This entry was posted on Thursday, February 11th, 2010 at 12:09 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.